Game of Thrones rapidly approaches the end of their eighth and final season last night, and so strong is the fandom, that people are seeking to penetrate themselves with props of the show.

Geeky Sex Toys have introduced a handful of dildos (get it?) that allow you to fantasize about the men of Westeros while you get off.


Naturally, the most popular toy is the one inspired by Jon Snow. Although if he doesn’t really float your boat, you can also opt to be filled by the Knight King, who’s penis glows in the dark, like a throbbing, veiny lightsaber. But if we’ve learnt anything from dating, it’s that the toxic men have the best dick, and ain’t no bigger asshole in Westeros than the Knight King.

Or, perhaps you’d like to take one of Denaerys’ dragons for a ‘ride’. And there’s also a Dragon Egg ball-gag.

How inventive. Check them all here.