Just in case you had any doubt as to what type of gay Colton Underwood was going to be; it is, of course, the subtle-not-subtle thirst trapping type.

This type of gay is a key player in the “epidemic of thirsty gay men”, who will not only gift you with the presence of their toned physique but will provide you with philosophic wisdom too.

His debut simply states: “this year i prioritized my health. physically and mentally.” So we presume he saw a therapist about those stalker vibes before penning his deal with Netflix.

Can’t be going to Puerto Vallarta with body fat > 7%.