In a recent interview with the Gay Times, the cheeky once-X Factor contestant said he’s “probably 20% gay”. Oh, hun. He probably thought he’d be making all the gays rise in the crotch – instead all he received was a load of raised eyebrows. Knowing Olly Murs (from TV, not personally), he probably said it half-bantering about his campness, but half-attention-seeking. Obviously, the entire village over-reacted. Can we have some perspective, people? How is the comment any more offensive than those awful bowler hats he wears?

Exactly. It’s not. It’s just a shame that he probably thought he’d of got a few dick pics in his IG inbox, and all he got was a bunch of keyboard bitches scrawling ‘BYE FELICIA’ on their Twitter Feeds. In all fairness though, it does serve a straight man right for believing that their every gay man’s fantasy. Maybe your next album should be called ‘Reality Check’.

Straight celebrities say stupid shit like this all the time; it’s their way of attempting to become a gay icon or sex symbol to secrete their fan base, because as any good publicist knows – GAYS ARE LOYAL… Until you fuck us off. *Click, click*.

Murs is harmless though. Unlike Nick Jonas. She’s like the Grinch, only instead of stealing presents she just robs all the queens of the pink pound. If I hear one more thing about him being in a gay bar, I’m gonna find out where he drinks coffee and spunk in his Latte. ANYWAY…

What exactly does “20% gay” mean? 20% of the people he sleeps with are men? He only puts the tip in?

Olly Murs went on to say, he “has a lot of gay friends” and “gets on well with them”. So maybe he just means he loves the dinner parties, but when they turn to orgies, man’s outta there. Let’s invite him to a chill out and see… If she don’t suck someone off in the bathroom, then we can throw her out on the street, and hurl quiche at the bitch.