Has anyone ever noticed how buff Instagram hoes are always posing with fast food. Like bitch, you never got that six pack or those v lines by eating processed shit. They’re just cotching on the sofa with £60 worth of Dominoes making perfection look like a piece of piss. No, sorry, not buying it. I reckon they totally do what I like to call a ‘bulimic back-hand’. They wave a slice of pizza in your face with one hand to distract you from seeing the one that’s down their throat. Either way, all I know is when I closed my IG, I’m hungry. Although dunno if it’s for burgers, or boy.

1. Pancakes + Nutella = Shredded. Of course it does. 

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2. Yeah ’cause you know that’s the only roll he’ll ever know of

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3. We’re sure there’s a chubby girlfriend that took the photo

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4. BRB going gym

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5. Nope. Not buying it. 

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6. All the ingredients for the body of a God

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7. Pays $20… Has one bite

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8. To be divided up over the next month…

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9. Dunkin Donuts sponsors V lines


10. There’s a reason the lid is still on…

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11. How do you think Willy Wonka got those guns?

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12. To be shared with 17 ripped friends

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13. How sweet, he baked for his nephew’s birthday party

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14. One for each pec

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15. *Licks icing*….. *Shoots self*

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16. He must be babysitting two fat kids

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17. Is this how they deliver them nowdays, because I know that shredded piece of ass ain’t tucking in

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18. They’re for the office… Not him

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19. “This doesn’t look like the bland salad I ordered…”

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20. The only thing he’s seen stacked that high are weights

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21. Now that’s just fucking ridiculous… 

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