Shinesty, an underwear company that presumably wants your package to do anything other than your partner on, have made an offer to Olympic diver, Jules Bouyer after his bulge went viral online.

Good Lord.

Another flailing company riding the coat-tails of a viral moment; like how that porn company offered Justin Bieber to fuck Jonny Rapid for a mere $1 milli. Of course, Bieber didn’t need the money, especially at not such great cost to his reputation, but it’s a way for brands to get their names into the headlines.

RELATED: Pole Vaulter Anthony Ammirati speaks out after own pole ruins Olympic dreams

Shinesty are doing the same, by offering Bouyer free underwear for life… sorry but I’d rather go commando. And here we are giving them free advertising but honestly: take it. Because these styles are not making overseas; the only people who buy this novelty naff are tasteless Americans (respectfully).

A rep from the company said: “When we saw what Olympic diver Jules Bouyer was packing in his South of France, it didn’t matter that we were an American company.”

“We wanted to give it a gold medal and protect that front truck of his for many Olympics to come.”

But, see, Bouyer doesn’t need the Ball Hammock Pouch Underwear ’cause he’s already got a bulge to flaunt. Anyway, let’s revisit that…

PLAY: QUIZ: Guess the Sportsman by the Dick [NSFW]