OK, so let’s talk about the All Stars 4 finale. We’ve had time to watch it, digest it, and re-watch it, and we certainly have some thoughts.

Let’s start with the challenge. Ever since the iconic ‘Read U, Wrote U’, fans will hope – and expect – a gag-worthy performance at this stage in the competition. We didn’t quite reach the same levels of sickiening with ‘Kitty Girl in All Stars 3, but each queen gave enough (throughout the elaborate stage set-up) that we didn’t feel disappointed. But even ‘Kitty Girl’, already had an edge over this relaxed remix of ‘Super Queen’.

Because of an almost acoustic rendition we didn’t get anywhere near the full throttle empowering dance anthem we needed.

All four queens, Trinity, Naomi, Monét and Monique are good performers, so you’ll understand why we had high hopes for the challenge. But what we’d forgotten, was that none of these queens were great with actual choreography apart from Monét. Although even the choreography felt sacrificed for the slower tempo of the song.

And rather than leaving gagged, we left with questions. Like, why was Naomi’s verse so short? Why wasn’t Monét wearing a wig? And most importantly, was the stress and pressure of the competition wearing the queens out of their best performances?

Though Monique killed half of her routine, she lacked energy in the group shots. Trinity was all in her head. And basically all of the queens have commented on the level of exhaustion.

Following that, in what felt like the quickest Top 2 announcement ever, Ru revealed that Trinity and Monét would stay. Before the pair delivered a truly juicy lip-sync to Christina Aguilera’s ‘Fighter’. Though Trinity clearly wanted it, and definitely gave it her all, she didn’t have the endearing quirks or jump splits of Monét.

Drag Race fans were subjected to another last-minute plot twist in All Stars when Ru announced not one, but two Winner! Winner! Chicken dinners! In fact, most shocked was Trinity herself, who can be seen fully GOOPED as she watches the spliced editing of her winner’s speech and Monét’s.

But really, who should Ru have picked? Trinity won the most challenges, and as an overall package is a bit more refined than Monét, but if it really was down to this week’s performance, as Ru has often judged, then Monét was the stronger contestant in the challenge and the lip-sync.

Some fans are angry that there were two winners, claiming it cheapens the stakes of the competition.

But the fact is, that RuPaul could never have won; his decision was doomed, to begin with. If he’d have picked Trinity then he’d have been constructing an all-white Drag Hall of Fame, (something that has already been mentioned plentiful on Twitter), and if he’d have picked Monét, he’d have been putting his own judgement up for question in picking such a newly-cast queen.

Others have suggested this as the alternate ending we deserved:

And thus, our thirst for a satisfactory ending to the season was mostly a mere dream to begin with. We are perhaps also in-part destined to be disappointed for as long as we chase the ‘Read U, Wrote U’ fantasy.

Image result for trinity and monet

At least this way, super fans won’t be trolling the other contestant for taking the crown. (Actually, we’re sure they will, but at least two powerful queens got their recognition).

While having two winners isn’t ideal, perhaps Trinity’s overall track record versus Monét’s performance on the night, was enough to justify it. To many, we’re sure it wasn’t. We’d have seen a real tight competition had Manila gone through, so we’re more pressed about that than having an extra queen represent.

Though we wouldn’t be surprised if injustice is all just a marketing technique to get disgruntled fans to return every season in order to recreate the scenario but with a satisfactory ending.