Watching last nights Hard Candy raised numerous points;
a) Why did they pick a kiddy fiddler that was so hot? Did they want the viewers on the edge of their seat because the ice pack was guna fall on the floor and reveal his “well built” equipment rather than his fight to save his balls? I was literally smothering myself with anti-wrinkle cream just watching it hoping I turn the clock back ten years if I hook a hottie like that. I actually left my house today on a scooter.
b) AS IF she didn’t even suck him off before she cut it off? She could’ve just taken out the middle man and just bit the mutha fucker off. But more interestingly…
c) Aside from fourteen year old girls, (that look like fourteen year old boys) there is some candy that is ‘off-limits’.
For instance, is a guy your friend likes off limits or is he fair game until something’s happened between them? There’s always that one friend who tries to iron brand (put her name on) every hot guy within a three mile radius just in the off chance they might one day notice they exist. In my opinion, if you like a guyand he likes your friend, just let your friend have him – there’s no point on you both missing out! And you might totally walk in on him naked when they movve in together. Or alternatively, when your friend tells you how he puckered up his bum hole up to their face, you totally dodged a bullet. (Silver linings people!)
So unless there is a clear attraction on BOTH sides, you’re definitely free to flirt…The trouble comes when the hot DJ starts flirting with you BOTH.
“Awkwarrrrd…” then it’s just a matter of who has the better legs and the shorter shorts.
Men that ARE off limits include:
- Friends Ex-Boyfriends
- Friends CURRENT boyfriends
- Friends Dads
- Boys under 16
- Boys under 18 (if you’re not stupid)
- Boys under 20 (if you’re not addicted to drama… and probably legal highs
Men that AREN’T off limits or in fact are actively encouraged are:
- Gym Teachers
- In fact, any teacher
- Brazilian bar tenders (that will probably bar tend until they retire)
- Boys you went to school with, that you only find out are gay years later
- Boys that DON’T remind you of the ex
And so if any of these latter men should occur, just remember Li-Lo’s phrase: “The limit does not exist, The limit does not exist!!”