We love coming across ominous nude photos almost as much at bottomless mimosas (we said ‘almost’). And the latest snaps of are of former One Directioner Zayn Malik – though we’re not 100% sure where they’re from yet. One Spanish site claims they’re ‘hacked’ – and though that could be true for his facial close-ups, we’re not convinced about the crotch-shot. Hacked from the photographer maybe, ’cause that ain’t no average selfie. If anyone knows more – you know how to contact us.

Zayn takes fellow crotch-grabbers Justin Bieber and Nick Jonas to school with a nude crotch-grab; that’s how it’s done, hun. Though, if you’d rather see him without his hand covering the goods – we’re HERE for you.